I got really angry over the weekend.
The reason isn’t important. I let someone get to me. Doesn’t really matter who. Or what they did that set me off.
The point is that I got angry.
Getting angry colors the way you look at things. And the way you feel things. And the way you react. Basically, if you let it, it screws up everything.
I’m getting better. I used to let a lot of things get me riled up. Now, it’s mostly relegated to traffic. And my computers.
I’m going to go ahead and out myself now. You may not believe what comes next, and I understand that. A year ago, I wouldn’t have believed it, either.
About a year ago, I started to talk to dead people.
That in itself isn’t really that big of a deal. I imagine there are lots of people who say or think things to dead people (some may even direct prayers to them).
But a couple months later, they started to talk to me.
I’ll pause for a moment to allow the cynics to leave. Another moment, for those who are offended to unfriend and unfollow me.
Still here? Good!
I don’t pretend to know everything. I don’t even pretend to know a lot. In fact, I don’t even pretend to know more than you.
When I’ve mentioned this to anyone, and there haven’t been many that I have, I get a few different reactions.
Some don’t want to hear about it and don’t want to talk about it. They don’t even want to know about it, and would prefer I don’t say anything more about it.
Some are willing to believe, if and only if I can produce some kind of proof.
And some are curious, but are quick to add that if people could come back to let us know something, then we would have heard about it by now.
Not really anything I can say to people who fall into that first group. You can’t make someone believe something, especially if they’re closed off and don’t want to hear it. And, that’s fine. There may come a time when they’re ready. And then again, they may never be ready.
I can’t really help the second group, either. Think about it. Is there a deceased relative in your family, that you think would go to the trouble to make contact with you, solely for the purpose of taking some kind of test?
Besides, I’m pretty sure that whatever proof I produced wouldn’t be enough.
For example, when I was still firmly entrenched on the skeptic side, I attended a spirit gallery at Teresa’s. We were just getting to know each other then.
Anyway, she asked everyone in attendance to think about who they wanted to hear from. I wasn’t sure who that would be for me. I mean, I was never particularly close to any of my relatives that have passed away.
Finally, I decided it would just be nice to hear from someone that they were proud of me. I’ve often had a low opinion of myself, and I thought it would be really nice to hear from someone on the Other Side that they were proud of me. Maybe I wasn’t such a screw-up after all.
The evening progressed, and different messages were relayed for different people. Then, Teresa described someone who she was having difficulty understanding, and I just knew it was my uncle.
I don’t think I’d thought of him in years, and have no idea why he popped into my head. But he had a very thick Yiddish accent, which actually made me laugh as a child, even though I had no idea what he was saying.
So he came through and said something along the lines of “Look at what you’re doing! You are amazing!”
And while this is a little difficult to describe, I just knew it was him. I could feel him, how happy he was to see me and how much he loved me.
Later that evening, I completely discounted the experience.
He didn’t give me any specific information, after all. Just that he was proud of me. Kind of a generic message. It could have been for anyone. Or from anyone.
The fact that it was exactly what I had hoped to hear, well, that didn’t matter.
I’m pretty sure that, for most, the kind of proof they would require would meet the same fate.
While the message was generic, the feeling was not. I could feel, in my head and in my heart, the love.
It might sound corny, but it’s true.
Unfortunately, over time, that initial overwhelming and almost intoxicating feeling can fade. And for skeptics, as I was, the temptation is to measure and quantify. So even though I got the exact message I was hoping for (which I’d told no one) and had that incredible feeling of being so loved, I was ready to dispute it again.
After all, he didn’t give me winning lottery numbers. Or any other information that only he and I knew about. Of course, he passed away when I was twenty, and I might have actually gotten to spend time with him twenty times in total in my whole life.
But I didn’t have anything concrete that I could point to.
And I think that’s one of the big problems most people have with this kind of thing. They feel that they might be willing to believe if they could just get some kind of indisputable, irrefutable proof.
There certainly were a couple of phrases that my uncle could have used that would have been that kind of proof. But if you could come back and deliver a message to your nephew, would you dig deep for something trivial you talked about thirty or forty years ago? Or would you tell him you were proud of him and you loved him?
I know which I would do, beyond a shadow of a doubt.
And then there are those who say if this were true, why hasn’t anyone come back to tell us?
I think they come back all the time. We just don’t, or won’t, hear them. Most want to believe, but don’t. Maybe they don’t know how. Or maybe they just think they know how the world works and this just doesn’t fit in with their view.
Or maybe they don’t think they’re worth it.
I think that last one is very true for a lot of people. They just can’t wrap their heads around the possibility that they are so loved, that someone would come back to tell them that.
I have news for you.
We are all loved. And everyone you have ever loved is just a thought away. It’s really that simple.
If you can’t hear them, can’t see them in your head, can’t feel them near, that doesn’t mean you’re not loved, or that you’re a failure. It doesn’t necessarily mean anything.
We’ve been so conditioned by books, television and movies to think that there must be some momentous event or occurrence to accompany contact from the Other Side. The ground should tremble. The lights should flicker. The temperature should drop. There should be slime. Etc.
It’s so much simpler than that.
Imagine someone you loved who has passed away. Think about them and how much you loved them. Think about talking to them right now. What would they say? Can you feel it?
Maybe that’s a little over-simplified, but that’s basically all it is.
Ever been in the middle of doing something and suddenly your grandfather pops into your head? You weren’t even thinking about him, and then all of a sudden, you are! If this has ever happened to you, odds are pretty good that you’ve already been communicating with the Other Side, and you don’t even know it!
You don’t have to be some kind of genius to be able to do this. There’s no secret of the universe you have to know, no secret skill you have to spend years developing, no special school you have to attend, no expensive online course you have to take.
I wanted to write something here about anger, fear and doubt. Those are the big three that can really get in the way, and make it difficult for you to love, or to feel just how much you are loved.
I know too many people who get all caught up in those, letting each fuel the other. I only hope they can figure it out and let that stuff go. Because when you can do that, everything is better. Colors are richer, music is sweeter, food tastes better. Every single sense is improved.
And do you really gain anything by holding on to the garbage? So if you want to try and think about it practically, what do you have to lose?
Usually, when I write these blogs, I give you some history on the song and the artist. I go over possible meanings of the song, and what I feel that it means, at least to me. But I think this one is really as simple as the overall message in this blog.
Believe that you’re worth it. Believe that you’re loved.
Because you are.
And that’s all you need.
Ken Kessler has always been interested in psychic phenomena, and like Mulder on the X-Files, wants to believe. But like most, he tends to look for, and accept, rational explanations. (More)